Masterpiece Classic is done for the season

Sadly, Masterpiece Classic is over and Mystery is starting up for the summer; I don't watch that third of MT so I have to wait for the fall and Masterpiece Contemporary to start.

Classic finished with a bang, that is the bombs of WWII London. Small Island was the story of the Empire, the colonial experience, the wartime and postwar experience, and gender roles in Britain. Jamaican colonists served the mother country during the war and a few fell in love with British women, lonely without their husbands. Such was the story of Queenie, who fell in love with a Jamaican soldier. After becoming pregnant by him and realizing her husband left her, she takes in two Jamaican newlyweds as boarders. Hortense and Gilbert are proud people but face the harsh reality that the Yanks introduced racism in Britain and it's not going away. In the end, Queenie's husband returned in shame, but Queenie vows to work on her marriage and gives her baby to Hortense and Gilbert, who start a bountiful life together.

Masterpiece had a darker, twentieth century focus this year, as promised. Return to Cranford failed to capture the magic of its predecessor, but was a warm story nonetheless. Emma continued with the nineteenth century, and according to rumors is the last Austen story to get a treatment in a while. I loved it. The 39 Steps was ok, but not good. I skipped Sharpe, having not seen the previous installments. The Diary of Anne Frank was another wonderful story, and was aptly followed by the WWII drama Small Island. No long series this time; Emma was three installments and Small Island two, but other than that, we weren't treated to the 5 parters that made Masterpiece a name for itself.

The Best of the This Season:

1) Emma

2) The Diary of Anne Frank

3) Small Island

4) Return to Cranford

5) The 39 Steps

Sharpe, didn't watch; Persuasion and Northanger Abbey were repeats.

I don't mind the modern series but I'm hoping for more period pieces come next winter/spring.

Track of the Week

"Rain On Me" by Cheryl Cole from the album 3 Words

Cheryl Cole returns to our blog this week with Rain On Me, the rumored 4th single from her debut album. Cheryl's voice isn't the best but she really belts it out on this song. I thought I'd offer up a more upbeat ballad than Change from last week. Rain On Me has a buoyant beat and an uplifting melody with lyrics that are reminiscent of Madonna's Rain, though without the overt sexual connotation. No video yet, so here's the song.

Other songs I'm enjoying at the moment are the epic "Outta My Head" and "I Got You" by the indomitable Leona Lewis, the fun-time song "Let's Get Crazy" by Miley Cyrus, and the rocking "Wrong Baby Wrong" by Martina McBride. I'm thoroughly sick of "Telephone" by Lady GaGa and Beyonce, and it's disgusting protect placement advertisement, er, music video. I'm over Ke$ha: "Tik Tok," "Blah Blah Blah," "Your Love is My Drug" and "Kiss and Tell," while fun electro-pop, are really the anthems of a culture I'm not too keen on. Christina Aguilera released "Not Myself Tonight," earning 'you copied GaGa' cries, but the song is just so bad to earn any comparison to anything other than a rubbish heap. Her froggish vocals are no match for the beats. Speaking of GaGa, she promises her 2010 release will be her best yet. While I am excited for new music, I'm over her whole 'grateful to the fans' persona and weirdness, she's someone I don't admire as a person, but I like her tunes. Kylie announced the June release of her new single, "All the Lovers" produced by the maverick behind Madonna's comeback album Confession on a Dance Floor, and the album is to follow in July. I'm over the moon. I've heard Coldplay has tackboards up in a studio whittling down which tracks to put on their new album, and Britney is 70% done with recording her seventh, according to some record label person on twitter. Meanwhile, the Queen is not recording any material, at all, despite rumors to the contrary. Give it to her to wait years to release something new, let's hope it's a right proper album and not pandering to a market that already changed like the last one. Let her enjoy her Kaballah-water AC in the meantime.

The Mothman Cometh: A True Story

Mothman is a Sci-Fi-Horror film about Point Pleasant, West Virginia. Local legend has it that settlers fought an Indian chief, Cornstalk, whose last act of retribution was to summon evil and turn into Mothman, basically a moth-like grim reaper. Fast forward to today and six friends are yanking one of their little brother under water, just to tease him. But he drowns and they cover it up by bashing his head in, one by one. Being a righteous daemon, the mothman cometh only when evil-doers get away with gruesome acts. In gory twists and turns, the mothman enters our world through mirrors (his version of portals include rear-view mirrors, drivers beware) and pick of the six friends.

Mothman is satisfying in that the six friends were so wicked that it was great seeing them get their just desserts. The Mothman CGI wasn't horrid like most of Syfy Channel's effects, and the gore was delightful, especially a line of guts sliding down a trailer. The acting wasn't exactly award-winning but it served its purpose. On the other hand, the costume department left something to be desired, the film was shot in an odd yellow hue, and Frank (the creepy old man character) was ridiculously deceiving.

Better yet, the Mothman Myth is real. So is Point Pleasant. So is the sightings and bridge accident of 1967. This adds a dimension of realism to the film, and an eeriness. Citizens of Point Pleasant still insist Mothman is real. Just as in the film, Point Pleasant commemorates Mothman at the yearly Mothman festival.

Mothman is worth the gore and CGI; the added layer of true elements makes the film worth a watch.

American Zombie

American Zombie is the story of the zombie community in Los Angeles. A mockumentary, comedy, and issues film, American Zombie slightly humorously follows several fictional zombies, or revenants as they prefer to be called. I didn't know that this film was actually supposed to be a statement about racism or civil rights going into it, but that became clear as the film progressed.

The fictional zombies themselves are mildly funny. Judy, an asian zombie, tries the hardest to hold onto her human past. She collects cat statues, makes scrapbooks, works at an organic food company, and is searching for a human boyfriend. Lisa, by far the funniest, is a florist who specializes in funeral arrangements while pursuing her not-so-good art. Ivan, a dud of a character, is a teenager that happens to be a zombie. Joel (pronounced ho-el) is the founder of ZAG, Zombie Advocacy Group, which puts on Live Dead, a zombie Woodstock. What happens at Live Dead is the big twist of the film...

The film is told from the perspective of real life documentary filmmakers Grace Lee and John Solomon, who are parodying themselves. This is another theme of the movie that some viewers may find pretentious, in that American Zombie is something of a tongue-in-cheek diatribe on documentary film-making. Many reviews I've read have claimed it's boring, and that's a fair assessment but the humor is more quiet and not a goofy in-your-face attempt at garnering laughs. The other biggest complaint is that the last third of the film takes a serious turn, but that's the point and I didn't mind it. The events of Live Dead shift the documentary's focus both in the film and the film itself. Also, there is so much foreshadowing to the climax that I don't know why people didn't see it coming.

I recommend this film if you have nothing better to do, but thankfully it's not too long. It's a wee bit boring but there's some twists that make it possibly worthwhile in the end. Perhaps that was part of the point, in that some documentaries can be hideously boring (read: Food, Inc. Waste of time!)

Track of the Week

"Change" by Carrie Underwood from the album Play On

Carrie's voice is perfect and soaring. On this song, about how an everyday person can make extraordinary changes only if they're willing, Carrie belts out an inspirational song. The violin backing music doesn't overwhelm her, but instead bolsters up the already emotional tune.

Carrie preformed it on Idol Gives Back last night and it was a show-stopper. Carrie is blessed with such a beautiful voice. It's not a single, but I think it should be after "Undo It" inevitably tops the country chart. There's no video, so this is Carrie's performance from last night.

Country may be cliche, but songs like this prove that uplifting messages can transcend genres. Carrie is an angel.

Rant: Remakes, and to a lesser extent, 3D

BSG: the Best TV Show Ever (Why Remake It?)

I sadly discovered that Bryan Singer is set to direct a Battlestar Galactica movie. BSG was riveting and science fiction (and television) at its best. With series and season long story-arcs like the X-Files, BSG was done right because it focused on amazing, deep, well-developed characters and amazing, deep, well-developed storylines. The show basically was about what it took humans from worlds destroyed by the cylons to survive while being aggressively pursued; throw in a heavy amount of spiritual and technological themes and you have as a sublime a television show as you’d ever get. And the ending was mind-blowing and very academic too. The need for a movie that has nothing to do with the remake series is lost on me. Why remake something that’s already been remade so well that you can’t possibly surpass it? Even the original 70s series (fans of campy scifi with like it) was sued by George Lucas for being way too similar to Star Wars. And do we have to be subjected to the inevitable 3D!

And this year alone a remake of a new movie is being pumped out. In this case, it’s a remake of the upcoming (hopefully) romcom (of the year) The Back Up Plan. Starring Jennifer Aniston, The Switch is a romcom about a woman who gets artificially inseminated. Uh, hello, strong J-Lo! J-Lo’s starring in exactly the same plot in her movie. Next thing you know, Jennifer Aniston’s turkey baster is going to pop out at you in 3D. The only thing about the Switch is that it’s based on a short story by a Pultizer Prize winner, so it may be deeper than The Back Up Plan. Though I’m a fan of Jenn, I have to side with J-Lo in this one. (Soundtrack suggestion: use So Hard by the Dixie Chicks, a heartbreaking song about the Chicks’ struggle to get pregnant.)

To be fair, a good portion of movie goers and critics were lukewarm to Clash of the Titans. My personal enjoyment of the film aside, we didn’t really need a remake. The original is iconic and its effects hold up to today. The story was better executed in the original, and the addition of the mechanical owl gave the movie an R2D2-eque character.

What Hollywood needs is originality. I’m certainly not hating on remakes (Dawn of the Dead and My Bloody Valentine were great) but just calling for some freshness in Century City.

Peter and Vandy: An Adventure into Indie Land

I had been on a misanthropic kick toward hipsters as of late, so in an attempt to temper that I decided to plunge into their world by watching an indie flick that was recommended to me through Netflix Instant. "Peter and Vandy" is a very short film (just over an hour) that has earned comparisons to the more mainstream 500 Days of Summer. Instead of breaking up in the end like in 500 Days of Summer, Pete and Vandy wind up getting back together. I liked how optimistic the ending was because it was unpretentious.

Peter and Vandy was neither good nor bad. It was so realistic that it was deeply unsettling and there were many raw scenes juxtaposed with warmer ones. Peter and Vandy was a memory narrative similar to La Vie En Rose, in that it had non-linear narrative structure composed of Peter and Vandy's collective memory. The dialogue was all realistic, save in the artsy part when they drifting apart from each other figuratively and mentioned having to walk to stores in the opposite direction (Peter even says "I'd walk with you, but I have to go the other way.") Peter was selfish, and Vandy was a little too good, and together they were very "Manhattan-urban-trendy-mildly-counter-culture." That was the part that tested my chagrin, but in the spirit of my adventure in watching this film, I really worked hard to suspend my irritation and wound up going along with the gamut of emotions in this film.

It's a brief but too perfect look at people who can too neatly work out their problems. On the other hand, it's very realistic that it's actually disturbing but winds up nicely. I liked the movie but I'd sooner watch Twilight. I never lied, I'm a mainstream junkie!

The Diary of Anne Frank

Masterpiece Classic aired the two hour new adaptation of "The Diary of Anne Frank" on Sunday. This was a really moving and powerful adaptation of the young Jewess' diary of the trials and tribulations of living in captivity during WWII. It's streaming online for a week at the PBS website.

The cast were all British but they did a faithful job recreating the Jewish experience and acting as the Dutch. I love the old movie from the 50s, but this one did as good a job with the story. Ellie Kendrick, a newcomer to acting, portrayed Anne deftly as the stubborn, sometimes petty, but courageous teenager she was. Her romance with Peter Van Damme was really sad because you knew they wouldn't live to fulfill the dreams they spoke of. Her parents gave rousing performances, and Felicity Jones captured Margo Frank's demureness but resoluteness.

I wept at the end of this movie. You'd have to be a Nazi yourself not to be moved to tears by this story. Anne was just a girl with big dreams and high hopes, but it was human hatred that denied her a chance to live them out. She was a human being, but her transition into womanhood is relateable for any teen, regardless of gender. Her struggle with comprehending the mad world around her is heartbreaking.

This was truly a Masterpiece.

Track of the Week

"I Keep on Loving You" by Reba from the album Keep on Loving You

Reba described this song, her newest single, as a message to her fans for sticking by her through the years. It was written by her friends Brooks and Dunn but fits her vocals very well. The song is your standard Reba fare: couples have ups and downs but stick it out. The electric guitar bridge near the end is jarring, but Reba's voice is epic.

In the video, Reba plays a relative attending a wedding, and the camera focuses on different couples going through the story of the song. I don't normally consider Reba much of a looker, but she's really pretty in this video in a stately sort of way.

The song won't be as big as Strange or Consider Me Gone, but it's already in the top twenty which is decent, considering Reba's singles for the previous few years haven't done as well. But she said she back to focusing on music now that her sitcom has been done since three years ago. Her tour is extending in the fall, so hopefully she'll grace Chicago with her presence.

I consider her the Oprah of country music, she's on top but it's all business for her in the guise of feel-good.

In Defense of Mr. Lucas

Described as a loving tribute to the YouTube generation, the new film The People vs George Lucas seeks to explore the love-hate relationship that Star Wars fans have with the Creator. I think on the seventh day God created George so I don't see the point of so-called 'Lucas Bashing.'

Jar Jar Binks and the whole Phantom Menace project, while commercially successful, has earned the derision of many fans and critics alike. I'm not a big fan of film critics (they loved A Single Man but that was quite the bore!) and fans are downright silly for bashing George when they pined for years and years for a new installment in the franchise. George is the man responsible for the creation the fans 'defend' when there's no need for a defense! Without George there would be no Star Wars, and just as if Madonna never lived, and Jesus never died, the world would be very, very, different. Though some films may echo the excitement, the wonder, the magic, of the Phantom Menace hype and release, nothing will ever trump it. 1999 was my favorite year; I have so much nostalgia for it all that it's actually really sad that more than a decade separates me from then. Jar Jar is adorable. Gollum was a far more egregious character in terms of annoyance than Jar Jar ever was. Jar Jar wasn't made for adult fans, George had the children in mind, and in light of that, he was successful at earning laughs from the kids.

Lucas has a right to tinker with his creations. After all, he made them. No one questions Michael Jackson for adding Fergie to Beat It on Thriller 25 ("he's an artist, he can do that"). George is an artist of the highest calibre! Sure, his ideas are silly sometimes (re: the fridge scene in Indiana 4) but that's why they're so darn endearing. I compare him to Madonna, in that her lyrics, because they're so unpoetical, they actually are poetic. George, like his friend Stephen, and peer Jim, is fascinated by technology. If he wants to add scenes, and replace outdated effects with CGI, by all means, do so. I embrace the changes. Film evolves. I loved the addition of Jabba the Hutt in A New Hope, and when he updated the Jabba CGI in 2004, it was even better. The ending of Return of the Jedi was great, it showed the galactic scope of the struggle. Sure, the "Han Shot First" crap makes Han less of a rogue, but George is family friendly. I will agree, replacing Sebastian Shaw with Hayden Christiansen was a crime, but only because it didn't make sense and I feel sorry that Shaw's portrayal was removed.

George is a marketing genius. Why people fault him for his huge campaigns is beyond me. The Cold War proved that socialism doesn't work, so I give George loads of credit for being as capitalist as a capitalist can be. It was thrilling with each new release to see potato chips bags, socks, toys, and Pepsi laden with Star Wars imagery. I love the commercial tackiness of it all! The Phantom Menace kid's meal toys were wonderful; I remember eating at Taco Bell, Pizza Hut and KFC all the time to collect them all. "Fans" who criticize George for over-marketing need not forget that Star Wars, after all is said and done, is a franchise, a business. George makes money off of his ventures and I doubt he'd do something without money in mind. He has a girlfriend to woo, and technological ventures to support.

Closing verdict: George shouldn't pander to the fanboys, he's better than that.

Clash of the Titans: Cute Creatures and Sam Worthington

*minor spoilage below*

I went into Clash of the Titans with some trepidation. Though I will always have fond memories of the original, this new movie was entertaining in its own way. The story deviated in that they condensed some elements and added new ones. The major change was the character arc of Perseus, who wants to prove his humanity by fighting like a man rather than using his abilities as a demigod. In the original he didn’t question the gods. They added the character of Io, played by the beautiful Gemma Artenton, who is the new Keira Knightley as far as I am concerned.

The CGI is great, and I don’t think 3D is necessary for this movie, having seen it as 2D. Pegasus’ wings are really realistic, and the Kraken is impressive. Medusa fell short: she wasn’t as terrifying as the original stop-motion Medusa; I think there were too many distractions in her scene and the CGI tail was pretty fake looking. A major annoyance in the movie was a religious zealot who goes after the royal family of Argos, but the other actors were really good, most of them being familiar faces to Masterpiece Theatre fans. The bad guy with the scar from Casino Royale pops up, as does Colin Firth's TCAP pedophile-bait from A Single Man. There were lots of cute creatures in this, my favorite being the Gin people. They resemble the helper that worked with Scotty in the new Star Trek, but with awesome black magic powers. A sentient severed hand even appears. The witches with the oracle eye were really well executed. I was awestruck by Charon, he was a skeleton twisted into the sinews of the wooden shop he pilots.

The jokes were a little conventional, but endearing in a Pirate of the Caribbean sort of way (though without the obnoxious water wheel and Keira-Johnny-Orlando banter). The training scene, though short, was cliché. Sam Worthington shined in this movie, and I’ll pay $10 again to watch him save the day in a Greek warrior tunic. He was his normal serious self, but mustered a smile (I counted twice in the movie) which was a departure for his otherwise predictable performance. His chemistry with Io was a treat, and I wish they did more with that story. The ending was different in that he doesn’t wind up with Andromeda, but there’s a nice twist in the end (though they could’ve shown them kissing).
Sam and Gemma: Great On Screen Chemistry

This isn’t better than the wonderful original, nothing can beat the mechanical owl, but it is a decent movie and I wound up really enjoying myself. This felt very Jerry Bruckheimer, and I think Guillermo del Toro could've made magic with this movie. 4 stars out of 5.

Sticky & Sweet CD/DVD Review

Madonna’s Sticky & Sweet CD/DVD or BluRay set was released this week to stores worldwide. The packaging is glossy and has a booklet of album credits and fantastic pictures by Esther’s longtime manager/agent Guy Oseary. The CD and DVD follow the same motif of the tour and the Hard Candy parent album.

The DVD is presented in surround sound with a widescreen ratio. The direction is not as choppy as that of the Confession Tour release, and there are more shots of Madonna, but being a Madonna show, the visuals of her background screens and dancers are highlighted, as is the crowd: a 60,000 throng of Argentines, pining in rapture for a glimpse at a rather small woman whose ego is so massive the stadium itself can’t engulf it. The sound is cleaned up, and her vocals are too. This is a real shame, because I love Madonna’s tour voice: it’s really strong. However, just when one thinks the vocals are too cleaned up, we get a familiar off-key, flat, or screaming note. I don’t think they edited the vocals per se, as I remember seeing the tour and my brother commented that her microphone sounded pitched higher.

The CD is the same audio as the DVD and can go with, or without the visual experience. It’s so Madonna to include Spanish Lesson, a universally derided song, on the CD as a defiant stroke to the public. A Madonna show isn’t complete with politics, and her Get Stupid video juxtaposes scenes of violence with hopeful figures, like Oprah. Madonna’s onscreen and onstage persona is larger than life: in one moment she can go from being a bitch, a sex goddess, to the Commander. It is in this last role that she is her most convincing; after gloriously belting out a song she hears the audience chanting her name in adoration, ordering more, she lays down on the catwalk, literally basking in the love. So many moments, whether beating up past incarnations or exposing a vest that has her name on it, are meant to pet her ego. Her dancing is perfectly timed, her singing is on cue, and her looks and banter is rehearsed: through a whirlwind of hits she is imperious. Even video cameos by Britney Spears, Timbaland, Kanye West, JT, and Pharrell, get lost in her midst. Madonna is the star of the show.

The musical arrangements are updated. Like a Prayer becomes a fierce rave backed by fiery screens. Into the Groove is a colorful tribute to her friend Keith Harring. Ray of Light and Hung Up are dance-metal infusions. Songs from Hardy Candy get a second wind, whether the swirling Heartbeat or the thumping Spanish Lesson. Madonna’s vocals shine on You Must Love Me, Don’t Cry for me Argentina, and Miles Away, as she strums a guitar; a rainstorm surrounds her as she belts out Devil astride a piano. The only embarrassing moment is when Madonna humps an amp with her guitar, the distorted frequency matching the cringing of the viewer. But all the while Madonna is beaming, transforming herself into a giddy 16 year old girl living out her wildest fantasy. Lots of jeers and sneers, the occasional smile, and hours of unforgettable hits leave the audience with the message Game Over: the Commander is in charge.

The behind the scenes documentary recalls her Truth or Dare and I’m Going to Tell You a Secret docs, but sadly this one is way too short. I love that smooth voice during the voice overs, telling us her message of unity. I love her diva personality, obsessing over the details. “I’m a gypsy,” Madonna says as her reason for taking back her many vows to quit touring. Madonna takes herself too seriously, but we do too. And that’s where the connection lies.

A+

Kirstie Alley's Big Life

I am big fan of celebreality shows and of Kirstie Alley so when I heard she was doing her own show I was excited. Kirstie is most known for her Star Trek role and her stint in Veronica's Closet. Her television show Fat Actress, a fictional take on her own life, was sadly short lived. Kirstie is hilarious and her show Kirstie Alley's Big Life, Mondays on A&E, is an expose on celebrity and weight loss and gains tackled with deft humor and some deep moments.

Kirstie is a natural, funny and engaging, and her show focuses on her big life: it's a busy mix of work and keeping up her house (and life) along with raising her two kids and tending to a cage full of lemurs, and on top of that she's really fat and trying to lose the weight. Her staff is heavily featured, and they are the only drawback of the show. Sure, their exploits are humorous and their interaction with Kirstie entertaining, but I can't help feel like she allows her self to be used and taken advantage of by being friends with them, rather than maintaining a professional relationship. They're lazy and annoying.

The deepest moments are when Kirstie's relationship with fame is explored. Such as when her most recent appearance on the Oprah Show was highlighted, and she muses about 15 minutes of fame. "You can never decide when it begins, or chose when it's going to end, but you can make the most of everything in between."

I also recommend Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood. Tori Spelling is the daughter of the late TV mogul Aaron Spelling (Charmed and 90210 are among his many credits) and famously left a life of millions to marry Dean McDermott, a z-list actor from Canada. Her life is a roller coaster of trying to get over her wicked mother and dealing with the pressures of her recently (re)expanding fame, while raising her infant children. She acts in her own life which makes it seem so fake sometimes, and conflates the drama in her life to annoying proportions, but her relationship with her friends, husband, and children is touching because it's the only genuine thing in her life. People who have said Tori can't act need to look no further, she's can't turn off acting. Tori & Dean airs on Oxygen. I also recommend her first book sTORItelling. It's a great examination of her life, and helps clear up the tabloid gossip that seems inescapable in her life.

Track of the Week

"The Time of Our Lives" by Miley Cyrus.

It's pretty pathetic at first that Miley is the track of the week this week. But Miley is ubiquitous and thus hard to escape.

This song, from her most recent (and eponymous) album is actually a stunning slice of pop. On one hand the song is so sad that I can't bear it, but on the other, it's a celebratory anthem of youth, however transient being young is: "let's have the time of our lives 'til the lights burn out." People grow up but that doesn't mean you can't live life when you're young. This is surprisingly deep for Miley, a bildungsroman song. This is one of the first songs in a long while to move me so much; it makes me want to tear out my eyeballs and put them in acid because the pain of that would be easier to process than the emotional pull of this song.

There's a mellow dance beat that picks up during the chorus, mirroring the melancholy-triumphant dichotomy of the song's theme. Her vocals on the choruses sound robotic almost, but it's not as bad of a use of auto-tune as in hip hop. Her smokey vocals have emotion to them rarely found pop music, and she can belt out a tune when she wants to.

RIP Caresse Henry Norman

Caresse was Madonna's manager for many years. She served the Queen through her Drowned World and Reinvention Tours. It is rumored that Caresse was fired/quit in 2005 after Madonna discovered her affair with a security guard. According to the sources, the Kaballah has a strict zero tolerance stance on infidelity. I'm sure it's easy for Madonna to cut of contact with people--she's done it before--but Caresse was a personal friend and professional manager.

Liz Rosenberg, Madonna's longtime publicist, released the details of Caresse's family and did not confirm whether or not Caresse actually committed suicide, as was previously reported. Madonna has not released a statement as of yet. Caresse worked with Paula Abdul and Ricky Martin among others. Paula Abdul's twitter was noticeably blank on any mention of Caresse.

Caresse will be remembered by most for her appearance in the Youtube video "Madonna Being a Bitch" which features Madonna being a bitch to Caresse. "Caresse, you have no idea. I can't take it."

Hellhounds: You Get What You Pay For

Hellhounds recently broadcast on SyFy channel; being a loyal viewer of their Saturday movies, I had to watch it. I'm sure they chose to air this movie because of Clash of the Titans' release. Kleitos, a Greek warrior, married Demetria, a Grecian princess. On their wedding day, she is captured by Kleitos' jealous best friend and taken to Hades. She dies but is revived. However, as Kleitos and Demetria make their way to the Seer that can save Demetria forever, they are pursued by a pack of Hellhounds. These, I believe, are based on Cerberus, the three headed dog of Greek mythology. They get to the Seer and she manages to figure out how to save Demetria, but sacrifices herself. In the end, the evil best friend is defeated and the hell hounds with him.

This movie is a case of getting what you paid for. They didn't spend much money on this movie, but it wasn't to the film's detriment. The costumes were great. The special effects for the Hellhounds were actually on par with the werewolves of New Moon (I guess that's not saying too much, from a certain point of view). I look forward to lots of gore, but this film didn't have that much. The acting was wooden in many parts, but at the least the leads were good looking enough to make up for it. I liked the Seer character, she could get a little cliche in parts, but her acting was good and her all-black eyes were good visual effects. There's a scene in a village where Demetria magically gets new clothes and Kleitos' brother is expected to carry a tray of apples on a horse that is laughably bad, but the well meaning intentions of the scene make up for it. The fight scenes in the woods are well shot, especially the horse riding moments, but the Hellhounds just weren't scary enough.
Kleitos and Demetria: Pretty People in Need of Acting Lessons

I'd watch this over 300 any day for its so-bad-it's-good qualities (the film itself is oddly endearing in its underdog way), but when all is said and done (that's an ABBA song, by the way) this movie needed scarier dogs and more blood, guts, and gore.

The Making of Alice in Wonderland

Alice in Wonderland was filmed almost entirely in front of a green screen. According to Wikipedia, Johnny Depp actually wore lavender colored contact lenses to avoid getting sick. Much of the cast and crew felt nauseated by being surrounded by the green screens for hours on end. The film was shot in conventional 2D and was later converted to 3D, earning the criticism of James Cameron, who advocated shooting in 3D.

Promotional stills released from The Visual Guide to Alice in Wonderland reveal that only the actors and costumes were real, and the entire setting was CGI. This resulted in a relatively short shooting schedule, 40 days in total. The sequence when Alice falls through the roof and sits upside down was shot right-side up, with a tall wig replicating the look of hanging hair. The deck of card and chess piece soldiers were portrayed by motion capture actors, while Cheshire Cat was all CGI. A veteran commerical actor was hired to preform the Fudderwacken sequence.

Johnny Depp said the character of the Hatter was easy to portray, as it just came out during filming. His casting and that of Helena Bonhome Carter was obvious, as Depp has been in many Burton films, and Carter is the mother of Burton's children. The film's storyline is self contained, thus a sequel would be unnecessary, but welcomed nonetheless.

Track of the Week: This One's for the Girls

This One's for the Girls by Martina McBride, from the album Martina (2003).

This is song is one of the reasons why country music is so darn good: it's a real life, relatable, uplifting, inspirational song. Martina's songs always have very positive messages, and this is no exception. The opening verse is about teens holding on to innocence when every one's giving in, which really touches the listener. The next one is about twentysomethings who are starting life fueled by "dreams and spaghetti-os" which is a very country/Reba "strong woman" line. The next one is about forty year old woman who are beautiful because their laugh lines show their experience, which is very Oprah audience.

Comments on YouTube range from "no thanks, id rather smoke, drink, have premarital sex and do any damn thing i'd like" to "Its so cheesy how good this song makes me feel haha." The sentiments of the latter sum up my thoughts on the song. It's so positive and sweet that you can't help but feel good and mushy.

The video displays some pretty horrific fashion, but Martina's so radiant that she's angelic. Go Martina! Overall, the song is inspirational but very country/Oprah/Reba, which could be cringe-worthy, laughable, or wonderful, depending on the listener.

Fun fact: Faith "Stepford Wives" Hill sings backing vocals.

Shine All Night Tour: Diverse Songs, Impressive Staging

Last night at the Convocation Center in DeKalb, IL, a suburb of Chicago, country rocked the arena, which was about 80% filled. I had paid $10 for a ticket, but there were a few rows open in the lower bowl, so I sneaked down and took a $60 seat. The view was incomparable. The Shine All Night Tour, a co-headlining tour of Martina McBride and Trace Adkins, opened with newcomer Sarah Buxton. Her set was short and unmemorable.

Then Trace Adkins, a country superstar, sung a set that varied between his mournful ballads and his redneck playful songs. Trace's set opened with a funny video that segued into I Got my Game On. Trace commanded the stage, swaggering about, singing in his signature baritone voice. He had moving set pieces and a lot of light and video screens. It surprised me because this was a big budget affair for a country concert. He gave the audience their money's worth by singing his hits, including Songs About Me, Chrome and Hot Mama. Many of his songs celebrate/objectify women and being redneck, and the video screens matched, displaying images of scantily clad redneck women. He showed his depth by thanking his fans for making You're Gonna Miss This the song of the year last year, and sung it with simple grace. One of his favorite songs of mine, Ladies Love Country Boys, switched the objectification from women to men, but switched back at the end of his set with his megahit Honky Tonk Badonkadonk, which made the audience go wild. He finished with an encore of Muddy Water and Higher Ground, displaying the gospel prowess of his voice. Trace was an accomplished preformer, singing superficial songs with bravado, and didn't let the thumping music overpower his voice and stage presence.

The arena filled up more before Martina's set. They completely changed the stage, which had two ramps added to it and larger screens. I was pleasantly surprised when a thundering dance beat started and she preformed a remix of the inspirational Ride. Much of her set consisted of her inspiration songs, which cross over into the adult contemporary, christian, country, pop, and dance genres. While Trace only had a few sections on their feet, the audience was enthusiastic for Martina, who stole the show. She had a cold, but bravely hit all the high and long notes of her songs, including the powerful Anyways. Each time she struggled but hit the notes, she got a standing ovation. Upbeat songs began her set, with hits Wild Angels and My Baby Loves Me, which celebrates the everyday wife and mother. The only awkward moment was a misplaced cover of Lean On Me that was preceded by such a joyous set of songs that it was as jarring as the shrill piano that accompanied it. She left the stage and came back out on a glowing crescent moon that sailed above the audience, preforming ballads like Concrete Angel, I Have Been Blessed and I'm Trying on the B-Stage. These songs were inspirational but sad at the same time, covering themes of abuse and heartache but also spiritual empowerment. She walked back to the main stage through the audience, belting out This One's for the Girls, a female empowerment anthem that celebrates girls of all ages and their inner beauty. The set ended with songs of escaping abuse, such as A Broken Wing, and then her best song, Independence Day, a soaring anthem of (again) escaping abuse as streamers jettisoned from the ceiling. She covered Summer of 69 for her encore.
This concert was a lot of fun, a blend of upbeat, rollicking songs, and moving ballads. Martina, despite her cold, belted her heart out. My only complaint was that the audience was a little less responsive than I would've liked. But I've heard country shows aren't known for standing and singing along. Poor Trace put on a great show, but only Martina could move people to stand up. I liked how the country hits were inspirational and traditional, but also the artists could step out of the box and be edgier (Trace's videos) or stage a pop concert with visuals, lights, and choreography (Martina) instead of pandering to the sometimes effected morals of the target audience. It was an interesting partnership that worked because of the diversity of their material. The icing on the cake was free Sunny D from the sponsor after the show!

Trace Adkins

1. "I Got My Game On"
2. "Swing"
3. "Songs About Me
4. "I Wanna Feel Something"
5. "All I Ask For Anymore"
6. "Marry for Money"
7. "Chrome"
8. "Rough & Ready"
9. "You're Gonna Miss This"
10. "Hot Mama"
11. "Ladies Love Country Boys"
12. "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk"

Encore

13. "Muddy Water"
14. "Higher Ground"

Martina McBride

1. "Ride"
2. "When God-Fearin' Women Get the Blues"
3. "Happy Girl"
4. "Walk Away"
5. "Wild Angels"
6. "My Baby Loves Me"
7. "Wrong Baby Wrong Baby Wrong"
8. "I Just Call You Mine"
9. "Lean On Me"
10. "Help Me Make It Through the Night"
11. "Anyway"
12. "Concrete Angel"
13. "I'm Trying"
14. "Love's The Only House"/"Blessed"
15. "This One's For The Girls"
16. "Two More Bottles of Wine"
17. "You're Not Leaving Me"
18. "Where Would You Be"
19. "A Broken Wing"
20. "Independence Day"

Encore

21. "Summer of '69"

True Blue: Madonna's Apex

(L to R: True Blue album-#1US, Live to Tell-#1, Papa Don't Preach-#1, True Blue-#3, Open Your Heart-#1, La Isla Bonita-#4).

In 1986 Madonna was the most famous person in the world. With two albums, and a score of hits behind her, she already had a solid base to build upon. Madonna was married to Sean Penn and wanted to explore her joy through her music. She reinvented her image, chosing a chic image that evoked classic Hollywood. Thus she enlisted Stephen Bray, her longtime collaborator, and Patrick Leonard, who would come to define her sound. True Blue was pop through and through, an expression of joy and love, but with a message. This was the 80s, when messages were everywhere. Madonna wrote or co-wrote every song on the album, and shared co-production credits on every song as well.

Papa Don't Preach opens the album with a defiant pro-life message, and uses classical instrumentation coupled with dance beats. Open Your Heart is an emotional power house, with a heavy dance beat and guitar chords. White Heat, Madonna's tribute to classic Hollywood, is a rollicking song that sample movie dialogue. Live To Tell, an aching, mysterious ballad, features raw vocals and profound lyrics, Madonna's best writing. Where's the Party, an anthem of Madonna's carefree persona, is another dance-rock song, but features a chorus of party voices near the end. True Blue, an homage to 50s pop, has a soaring chorus and is a love song for Sean Penn. La Isla Bonita, offered but declined by Michael Jackson, is an ode to Latin America and introduced a character of latin instrumentation and imagery that Madonna would revisit. Jimmy Jimmy, Madonna's tribute to James Dean, is a poppy, upbeat song. Love Makes the World Go Round is a very 80s song because its message of love and empowerment; Madonna wrote and preformed it for Live Aid a year earlier to raise money for Africa and AIDS.

True Blue is a cohesive record in sound and style. Madonna's singing retained the girlish exuberance, but her vocals were less thin. The Guinness Book of World Records called True Blue unprecedented, as it topped the charts in 28 countries, and became one of the best selling albums by a female artist in the world. Madonna couldn't have known Sean Penn would abuse her with a baseball bat when dedicating the album, but the lyrics in Jimmy Jimmy are telling: "why oh why do fools fall in love with fools like you." True Blue is really a triumph for music and Madonna, a true masterpiece, an album of epic proportions.

The videos for True Blue are some of Madonna's best remembered. Live to Tell is a simple video, but Madonna is at her most beautiful and most vulnerable as the camera hovers around her, like a person pressing for the secret of the song. Madonna plays a teenage mother in Papa Don't Preach. In Open Your Heart she explores themes of pedophilia and voyeurism, and celebrates her Italian heritage. True Blue was a simple video that paid tribute to girl groups of the 50s and 60s. La Isla Bonita cast Madonna as a forlorn Latina, praying for her lover and finding an escape in the music of the streets.

If anyone should listen to a Madonna album, True Blue is it. It's her most successful and the apex of her career. She launched her Who's That Girl Tour on the heels of True Blue and the Who's that Girl soundtrack (whose songs Who's that Girl?, Causin a Commotion, and The Look of Love are sonically identical to True Blue). Madonna toured in stadiums and parks, playing to sold out crowds in the 10s and 100s of thousands. She visited Europe, North America and Japan. In Japan, heavy rain caused the cancellation of a show, which prompted heavy rioting as the fandom reached a fervent pandemonium. At the time, this was the highest grossing tour and Madonna commanded the highest playing fee in the industry.

A Sam and J-Lo Moment

One of the highlights (one of the only highlights) of the Oscars this year was Sam Worthington and Jennifer Lopez presenting together. It didn't last long, but their moment on stage was third behind Mo'Nique's incredible speech and Oprah's effusive praise of Gabby. J-Lo is one of those rare people who would look good wearing a dirty garbage bag, and she's earned my respect for her transition from pop to romcoms. She's critcized as being boring, but under that diva exterior she's a really normal person, who enjoys spending time with her kids. She's still Jenny from the Block. On her twitter, she posted:

Sang What Is Love at San Remo! New song from my new movie The Back-up Plan. Saw it last week during a press junket. Ugh, junkets are tough!

On one hand, it's so ridiculous to think press junkets are tough compared to what the Precious girls everywhere go through, but for me, this was endearing. I understand J-Lo's stress is positive. She's getting out there and feeling good about working hard. It's heartwarming that she takes pride in her artistry.

Sam, on the other hand, is for me the modern day Tom Cruise. Even though I hate "modern day" comparison, like saying Gaga is the new Madonna, I think it fits in his case. He's a good looking action star. Yes, like Tom he's cocky and conceited, but I like that Sam doesn't take shit about Avatar. It's not a crappy movie, and he sticks up for it. He's quite boring beyond that, but the films I've seen him in so have been some of my favorites (Terminator and Avatar).

But when they presented together, it was a magical moment. Their chemistry was so intense. There were lots of smiles, and even some laughter. You could tell they really got along. They probably had so much fun presenting together! Sam recently said to the press that he felt starstruck being on the same stage as J-Lo. That's really awesome. He knows a star when he sees one. (Is anyone else thinking what I'm thinking: real life shipping pair?)

This is quite the fangirl post!

TRON: Legacy

Alice in Wonderland is the movie of 2010, but TRON: Legacy is being released in December. Time will tell if this is a good movie, but judging by the trailer, it will be amazing (though no trailer will beat how epic the Blindness trailer was). Hedorah and I were in giddy fan mode when the trailer started, coupled with the fact that it was in Xtreme Digital 3D and attached to Alice.

The part that sent chills down my spine was when Jeff Bridge's son dusts off the Tron game. Then he enters into the Tron game and the trailer really takes off. The scene where he rides slowly up on that circular platform is another chilling scene, as the staticy electronic music plays during a montage of clips of the characters. The game with the glowing hollow disks looks great, and I love the David Bowie-esque guy rocking with the glowstick. And of course we're teased with just a snippet of a light cycle chase.

I calculate this will be a worthy tribute to the first movie, which I have a lot of fond memories of. I'm not sure if Garrett Hedlund can carry the film, but that's my bias against his raspy voice. The female supporting cast looks like a good balance between a femme fatale vibe and the sexy sci fi girl, and it's fantastic that Jeff Bridges was humble enough to come back. It also seems that the CGI recalls the effects of the first film, which hold up today.

And what can beat Tron set to a Daft Punk soundtrack? Kudos to Disney!

Breaking News: Dixie Chicks Reunite

I am jubilant that I can post this. The Dixie Chicks have reunited and will hit the road this summer on a stadium tour with The Eagles and Keith Urban. The Chicks were all but broken up after the 2007 Grammys, where they swept the awards. Natalie cut her hair off and retreated to LA, and the sisters Martie and Emily just announced their solo project The Court Yard Hounds. Seems to me Nat got jealous the sisters were making music again and reasserted control of the band from them just as it seemed they didn't need her anymore.

The Dixie Chicks are the best selling female group of all time, even more than The Supremes and Destiny's Child. Their hit albums have sold millions of copies, and they are well known for hit singles "Wide Open Spaces," "Goodbye Earl," and the defiant "Not Ready to Make Nice." After their infamous comments about George Bush, they were hailed as heroes and derided as "Dixie Twits." But the Chicks were resolute, and country's girl power group released their masterpiece "The Long Way Round" a testament to what they endured.

8-Jun *Toronto, ON Rogers Centre
10-Jun East Rutherford, NJ New Meadowlands Stadium
12-Jun Boston, MA Gillette Stadium
14-Jun Philadelphia, PA Citizens Bank Ball Park
15-Jun Washington, DC Nationals Park
19-Jun Chicago, IL Soldier Field
22-Jun *Winnipeg, MB Canada Inns Stadium
24-Jun*St. Louis, MO Busch Stadium

*Keith Urban not appearing.

Non Traditional Kawaii Parte Dos

60th post! Just want to say if anyone's casually reading or drops by, feel free to comment or subscribe. Consider this Part Two of my Feburary Post "Non Traditional Kawaii."

The Zombie from Zombi 2. This is an iconic image in the zombie world. The poor bugger is decomposing, but that's part of why it's so kawaii. The worms pouring out of his orbital cavity, the empty expanse of the other eye socket, and the mouth that could be considered a snarly grin.

I've always considered Gragra cute. According to EU lore, she breeds her foodstuffs in the sewers of Mos Espa. Jar Jar tries to eat one and becomes entangled, raising her ire. Her mouth looks like a smile, and the big dark eyes draw you in. She looks like a female, portly Ryuk.

If ever you find yourself in an abandoned warehouse set with traps, you wouldn't want to meet this guy. But Billy the Puppet is adorable. The little suit and the way he rides the tricycle are normally considered cute on children, but in our world, the evil puppet is cuter. He's the messenger of despair, but if you play Jigsaw's game by the rules, he's an arbiter of hope.

Michael Jackson. We can consider ourselves fans before he sadly passed away, and defended him against his detractors. The plastic surgery was gruesome, but in an odd way it worked. I'm not saying he's cute in the traditional sense, but in a tug-at-the-heart strings way. He was vulnerable, but his childlike sense of flying, magic, and wonderment was awe inspiring. He was Peter Pan, in his heart. His bizarre sense of style, his ranch of weirdness, and even the moments in the 2003 documentary were adorable. We miss you, and love you always, Michael. His message was Love, and we'll never forget. He had so much love in his heart.

A Local's Guide to Chicago

Chicagoland is a sprawling urban flatland of 9 million souls. Like Rome of yesteryear, every road (plus train and plane) leads to the metropolis. Chicago is a massive city, and to the visitor this can induce anxiety. For every tourist trap, there are some undiscovered, or perhaps under appreciated tourist spots, restaurants, and places to see.

Architecture enthusiasts should avoid those pricey architecture tours. They're a rip-off, and for the amount you pay, you don't see a lot. I suggest watching Geoffrey Baer's river tour of Chicago on DVD and taking a Chicago River Taxi. Wendella Boats, I've been told by their competition, is unreliable, but for the price you pay ($6 round trip), you can enjoy a leisurely glide down the Chicago River. It departs from Trump Tower, near the Michigan Avenue bridge, and stops at Madison (between the Lyric Opera and Ogilvie Train Station) and at Chinatown (at the pagoda). They pass stations up sometimes, but that's part of the experience. At Chinatown, peruse the stores for prices that are a steal, and enjoy lunch with massive servings at the Moon Palace Restaurant. At Navy Pier, walk around and look, but spending money will exhaust your budget. Instead, purchase a trip on one of many boats on the pier, and see the skyline from the Lake. It will cool you down and affords beautifully views; on a clear day you can see as a far as Indiana. Enjoy Massa Cafe's stand on the pier for delicious gelato.

Chicago is a dining mecca. There are so many restaurants it can be a little overwhelming to make a decision. Pasta Palazzo (at Halsted & Armitage) is a Lincoln Park Italian restaurant that serves delicious, generously portioned pastas. They used to only take cash and served drinks in plastic cups, but through the years, they've moved up to credit and glassware. It's atmosphere, replete with low lighting and colored walls, coupled with a din of conversation, is warm and inviting. Get a window seat, it's worth it. Chain restaurants are equally delicious. Though Giodano's Pizza is the king of Chicago style, I also recommend California Pizza Kitchen. They have a plethora of wonderful pizza "flavors" and prompt service. Tip: request a bread basket, it's free but if you don't ask, you won't receive. I like the CPK on North Avenue, but the best is in Water Tower Place Mall on Michigan.

Chicago's green lung are its park systems. The parks are an attraction in themselves, and if you don't have money, they are a cheap way to entertain. Grant Park, in the lower Loop, is vast but sitting on the berm on Lake Michigan on a sunny spring day is a transcendental experience. Lincoln Park is good for a walk along tree-lined paths on a slightly rainy day, and the zoo is free. The Lincoln Park Zoo is an antiquated "zoological garden," so flora and fauna fans will be equally amused. It's a real charmer. Garfield Park is on the South Side, but don't let that deter you from strolling in the massive humid conservatory. The flowers are pretty and the koi ponds are cute. The best park is Washington Square, near the Gold Coast. It's across the street from the Newberry Library, and is boarded by a wrought iron fence. Park goers sit around a massive fountain, as children play in the groves of flower beds and trees.

Chicago's museums are world renowned. The Art Institute of Chicago is on Michigan, just off Adams. I suggest eating at Au Bon Pain across the street, then going in on Thursday night for free admission. You'll find everything from impressionism to Dali. The Field Museum is a natural history museum. Check the calendar for free admission days, and go see the Man Eating Lions of Tsavo and Sue the T-Rex. For kids, the Science and Industry Museum is a playground of exploration. There's everything from a submarine to fetuses in glass jars (my personal favorite).

The United Center, on the Near West Side, is located in an iffy area of town, but it offers reasonably priced concert tickets in the upper 300s tier. The UIC Pavilion showcases college-rock shows, but sometimes people like Kylie Minogue play there. Most concerts stop at the Allstate Arena and the Rosemont Theatre in Rosemont, adjacent to O'Hare. Take the Blue Line from the city; it's under an hour and fares are super cheap. Allstate is big enough to bring Britney Spears, but it's feeling is intimate. The Rosemont Theatre is smaller, but a great place to see up-and-coming artists. Call the box office for better seats than what's offered on ticketmaster. Find a cheap ticket broker if seeing a broadway play at the Cadillac Palace, it will save you money (prices are usually about $18-$30 for decent views this way).

Avoid Chicago during the Taste during the summer, and on sports-game days. For a city that's already a zoo, it's a mess then. Trains from the suburbs run into Union and Ogilvie Station at reasonable fares. The L, Chicago's subway/overhead train system, can be accessed using the same cards you use for the buses. They can be purchased nearly everywhere, and are the best bang-for-your buck. Midway Aiport is in the South Side, a bad area of the city, but take the red line north to the Loop. It's far cheaper than a cab. Don't even think about cabbing from O'Hare, it's nearly $50. Instead, take the blue line. Trains and buses run about every 8 minutes, a vast majority of them offer "night owl" service. When asking for directions, ask for the intersection, that's how everyone gets from point a to b. Many times, distance but time of travel is referred to, as traffic is dependant not on how far, but how long.

Bon Voyage,

Oprah

Like a Virgin: The Triumph of New Wave and the 80s

(L to R: Like a Virgin-#1 US, #1 UK, Like a Virgin single-#1, Material Girl-#2, Angel-#5, Dress You Up-#5, Into the Groove-#1 UK)

Today marks the second installment of Something's Wrong with Esther's Madonna album reviews.

Like a Virgin was released in 1984, and is rightly considered one of the most influential albums and a landmark in music and pop culture. Madonna had recorded a few tracks that were left off of her first album, and the release of a second proper album was delayed by the success of her first. This caused Warner/Sire to release more singles than anticipated from the Madonna album. Warner employed Niles Rodgers, a member of disco group Chic, to produce Like a Virgin. Madonna's image was largely the same as her first album, though more chic and frilly. Rather than continue with the disco sounds of the first album, Like a Virgin uses synthesizers, the guitar, and prominent drums, all the signature instruments of New Wave. Warner allowed Madonna to use some of her own songs, but half of the album was written by songwriters. The album was a massive success, eventually selling 10 million copies in the US alone, but the critics reviled her as a one hit wonder, and (perhaps a just description of her vocal chirps) "Minnie Mouse on Helium." The theme of the album was the many facets of love--sex, flirtation, romance, abandonment, etc--presented with glossy production and simple, though memorable lyrics, and dance beats.

Material Girl starts the album as an ode to the commercial materialism of the 80s. Angel, a softly sung ballad backed with plucky dance beats, is followed by Like a Virgin, a synthesizer heavy track with a signature groove, and very high pitched vocals. Over and Over, an urgent, upbeat track features drums and plucking electronic chirps. Love Don't Live Hear Anymore, a cover of an older song, is a lament of lost love that is song so magnificently Madonna is literally breathless at the end. Dress You Up, a sparkling, drum and dance track, is a perfect expression of Madonna's themes of sex and fashion. Shoo-Bee-Doo, somewhat of a dud, is a simple piano ballad sung in an emotional tone. Pretender has upbeat chiming and mournful lyrics about a deceptive lover. Stay closes the album as an epic, stomping ballad with fierceness not found in such songs normally.

Like a Virgin's songs are largely ballads, but their melodies and backing tracks are soaring, epic, and upbeat. The drums, synthesizers, and guitars blend seamlessly, accompanied in many instances by claps, chimes, and plucky beats. The tone of the album is bubblegum pop, almost like fifties malt-shop pop, but updated to the 80s. The album was a massive success because of its youth, exuberance, and appeal to the young MTV demographic, who could instantly relate to the girlishness of the album, but also the maturity of the lyrical content. Like a Virgin is sleek and solid, and took Madonna from a successful debut artist to an international superstar.

It's videos were heavily featured on MTV. Like a Virgin, drawing from her controversial VMA performance (she gyrated on stage in a wedding dress, it shocked the world), features Madonna dancing around in Venetian canals. Material Girl, an homage to Marilyn Monroe, was expertly choreographed. Angel didn't get a video, but single Dress You Up was released as a live clip from her Virgin Tour. The Virgin Tour was a massive success. Madonna was originally scheduled for theatres in major American and Canadian cities, but the sheer demand for tickets bumped her up to pavilions and arenas. T-shirts sold by the hundreds in minutes. Madonnabes (Madonna Wannabes) dressed up as the star, as she danced energetically and sang her hits. The Virgin Tour was a triumph for Madonna, selling out everywhere she played. Stops in England and Japan were scrapped as Madonna prepped for her next album and preformed at Live Aid.

Into the Groove, Madonna's best dance song, was from the Desperately Seeking Susan soundtrack, but released as the B-Side to Angel in the US, and charted as it's own single everywhere else, becoming Madonna's first UK number one.

Madonna: The First Album

(L to R: Album-#8 US, #6 UK, Everybody-#3 dance, Burning Up-#3 dance, Holiday-#16 pop, Lucky Star-#4 pop, Borderline-#10 pop)

As it's between albums and I can't think of anything else to write about, I'm going to be starting a new series reviewing Madonna's studio albums.

Madonna (The First Album- UK Title) 1983

The album was recorded in New York under the direction of DJ Mark Kamins, who discovered Madonna in the club Danceteria (where she would sit in the corner reading a book instead of mingling). Her rough demos were hits in his club, and she was signed to Warner/Sire and began recording with Reggie Lucas, who was booted off the project after Madonna was dissatisfied with his productions. She then brought in her boyfriend Jellybean Benitez to remix the tracks, and it was during these last sessions that she recorded her hit Holiday. Madonna wrote every song on the album, except for Holiday and Borderline. Curiously, she is credited as the original writer of Physical Attraction, but Reggie Lucas was later given sole credit.

The sound of the album, disco and dance, was a risky move for its time. Disco was declared dead a few years earlier, yet as always Esther had the foresight to be the first in an era defined by synthpop. Bridging the gap between disco and dance was a departure for Madonna, who had spent her first few years in New York as the guitar player (she didn't play well) and lead singer of the New Wave bands Emmy and the Breakfast Club. Madonna's image--thrift store clothing, crucifixes, and loads of jewelry--was influenced by her friendships with artist Andy Warhol and Keith Harring, as well as her Catholic childhood and personal love of freedom.

Sparkling, cascading synths start out opening track Lucky Star, which contained lyrics based on the classic children's poem Starlight Starbright. It's dance beats were instantaneous and unrelenting. Borderline showcases the urgency of Madonna's vocals and has synthesized xylophone chimes. Burning Up, Madonna's foray into New Wave, has prominent guitars backed by a dance track. I Know It is a buoyant dance track with oscillating synthesized piano chords. Holiday, Madonna's signature song, starts out softly then lifts off into a celebratory, carefree dance track with repetitive, though festive lyrics. Think of Me is more disco than dance, but with electronic pulsating beats. Physical Attraction shares the same synthesized harpsichord-like chiming with Borderline, but has a memorable clapping beat. Everybody closes the album with pulsating electronic noises and spoken word sections that call everybody to the dance floor.

Madonna is successful because of its structure: fireworks of synths and simple, repetitive, and memorable lyrics. Madonna's eponymous first album is one of her best, unparalleled in its effervescence. Madonna's voice is high pitched, almost squeaky. There is a sense of urgency and exuberance, a carefree joie de vivre. She sounds simultaneously in control yet pining at the same time. For me, this is a special album because it's innocent. She's at the beginning of her career, and wasn't pushing a message beyond having fun. Naive but inviting, it's a celebration of fun.

Madonna's first music videos were made during this period. Everybody is a simple video of Madonna dancing in a lighted dance studio. Burning Up was another budget affair, but contained cutting edge effects of the day (Madonna's mouth magically multiplies on a door), and features Madonna on a road begging for her lover. Holiday was deemed too cheap to be released, and thus the embarrassment never surfaced. Lucky Star is one of her best loved videos. Madonna dances in a white room in black clothing. Borderline was the first widely aired Madonna video, and was a hit especially with the teen demographic. Madonna dances around in New York City waiting for her lover to respond.

Life: Oprah and Animals

LIFE, narrated by Oprah Winfrey, aired last night on the Discovery Channel. This was the first of five installments, showing every Sunday night. There was no Masterpiece on, so I was able to watch something else. LIFE follows the same premise as 2007's epic television event Planet Earth, but instead of focusing broadly on Earth's ecosystems, LIFE focuses on the basic principles of life on earth: mating, defending, etc.Oprah's narration was criticized by many for replacing Richard Attenborough's BBC narration, but Oprah was actually good in my opinion. Her intonation is familiar and her narration reminded me of someone reading a children's book: warm and inviting. The filming, like Planet Earth, was stunning, but I feel like this is something of a rehash of that former series. Oprah at least spruced it up with her lucid narration.

In other Oprah news, it's been widely reported that ex-View and talk show host herself, Rosie O'Donnell is going to replace the Queen of Daytime TV. This is really sad. I remember watching Rosie's show as a kid and even then I knew it wasn't as good as Oprah's. Rosie is a slob, abrasive and obnoxious. She calls for tolerance when she herself is intolerant. Perhaps because I sided with The Donald during the Rosie/Trump feud a few years back, but I would venture to say that Rosie's show will tank. But people are sick little puppets and they'll probably tune in to watch her opinionated banter. I would have put Ellen in Oprah's time slot. Ellen is famous already and has proven her skills as a talk show host.

Who said Zombies Can't be Cute!

Hedorah showed me an excellent campy/b-movie zombie flick by Peter Jackson called Dead Alive, released as Braindead everywhere else. How could Pete go from making such a masterpiece in over the top gore to the LOTR trilogy? I've seen this film derided on the internet, and that's sad. This movie will satisfy gore and humor fans. Anyways, I consider this post Part 2 of an earlier post about Non Traditional Kawaii. Dead Alice contained many adorable zombies.

One such zombie is the zombie baby. The spawn of the priest and a zombie woman, the zombie baby provides some of the best moments in the film (besides the mother's gasp, the glowing zombie, and "this calls for some divine intervention"). The zombie baby reminds of Kuato's evil twin. When he goes for a day in the park, he can escape even barbed wire, and goes careening down a hill in a tram. The attempts to stop him from attacking the park goers are hilarious. I don't like normal babies, but I do love zombie babies!

I couldn't find a picture of the organs, but they are really kawaii. The zombie organs are the remains of another zombie that take on a life (or unlife) or their own. They attack people by using intestines like rope. The cutest scene is sadly its demise, when it puts together what looks like lungs as "hands" begging for mercy. The heart as the face is adorable. I did find a picture of the half-head zombie in the ensnares of the organ zombie's intestines.
Lastly, the rat monkey found in New Zealand's outback is really cute. Hedorah said it's reminiscent of Salacious Crumb, and that's right. The rat monkey bites the mother at the zoo, which leads to the whole mess of zombies in the little town. Its demise, though sad in that it's cuteness is extinguished, is funny because the mother stomps it to death. At least it enjoyed a meal of a primate arm before it died.

So I ask again, who said zombies can't be cute? These ones sure are!

Un baiser s’il vous plaît: A Romcom with Brains

While on this French kick, I will review a French film. Un baiser s’il vous plaît was released in France in 2007 but is technically a new film here in the States as it was just released on DVD. I’m not sure what the French title means, but here it was released as Shall We Kiss? The trailer and DVD cover don’t do it justice, making it seem more like an average romcom than the thoughtful film it actually is.

Intellectual, ironic, and charming…

This film is a fatalist work that explores the consequences of human behavior and how people react to it. The theme is that people will do what they want, and it is one’s choice to react emotionally or to wait for time to take its toll or work its magic. The film begins with two people, Gabriel and Émile, who fall in love at first sight. However, the story of Judith and Nicola, les amis d’Émile, who are involved with other people but fall in love (despite, or because of, their deep friendship). Judith kind of just goes along with what Nicola wants, until she realizes that she has hurt her husband Claudio. Their story ends with Nicola quite happy they are together (he really seemed to want it more, while Judith’s emotions were more conflicted) and Judith telling him it will take time for her to be happy (again, highlighting the fatalist theme of the movie).

Gabriel and Émile give in and share a very passionate kiss, but it turns out Émile is Claudio’s new wife, and she decides that Gabriel should go. The fatalism of their ending is that they shared this wonderful night together, talking and one kiss, but rather than let Claudio suffer again, they chose to suffer for a missed opportunity. This ties directly into Judith’s feelings, because she attempted to lessen the blow to Claudio by contriving a date with Nicola’s ex-girlfriend, Câline, that ultimately exposed her deception, which hurt him more.

Fatalism, this film posits, is to suffer but not complain, because (to paraphrase Câline) whining doesn’t take the suffering away, only time.

The cast was superb, and their acting was subtle but pronounced enough to impress the viewer. With the exception of Nicola (and his unibrow), they were all beautiful in a way only the French can be. The music, by Shubert (this ties into the plot), was pretty too. The cinematography, art design, and costume design of this film was all minimalist, relying on a chic use of shades of white. The direction of the film highlighted the cerebral aspects of the plot, by placing characters in front of art pieces, and creating shots that looked like oil paintings themselves. The script tackled intellectual conversations with deftness and humor that The Single Man tried for, but lacked.

The grace of the characters, the grace of the plot, and the grace of the filming was light enough that it made the implications of the film all the more surprising. Roger Ebert criticized the prettiness of the cast, the conversations, and the camerawork, but I think it had to be light enough for such thought provoking fatalist subject matters. This film was, if anything, very, very, very French (quite!).

I think a remake by Hollywood would be expertly handled by Natalie Portman as Judith, Michael Vartan as Gabriel, Cate Blanchett as Émile, Amanda Seyfried as Câline, and Jason Schwartzman as Nicola. If you see this movie, you will see what I mean. Come to think of it, this seemed like a Wes Anderson or Sophia Coppola film that didn’t take itself seriously.

If you’re in for a good foreign film, watch this movie!

Brigitte Bardot

While working on my Dakota Fanning post, I realized how many stars were inspired by Brigitte Bardot. Bardot was the sex symbol of the sixties, and came to symbolize the aesthetics of the decade, with her soft blonde hair and heavy eye makeup. Her work with Serge Gainsbourg is best remembered by their hit single Bonnie et Clyde, a spoken word track that epitomizes the intersection of French fashion and experimental music. Several decades, drugs, husbands, and run ins with the law later she looks like an overfed bird.

Country star Faith Hill, pictured on her favorite magazine to cover for, was inspired by Bardot for a photoshoot that preceded the infamous photoshopping one (also on Redbook). It's very Stepford Wives of her.

Aussie superstar Kylie Minogue's entire Body Language project, from the videos, to the album photoshoot, to the concerts, were inspired directly by Bardot. Kylie's song Sensitized uses the backing track of Bonnie et Clyde. Kylie even preformed a medley of Serge Gainsburg's over sexualized song "Je t'aime...moi non plus" to highlight her erotic approach.

And for the inevitable Madonna connection, she was first inspired by Bardot for her iconic black and white Cherish video. Madonna called it one of her more "retarded" songs, but the connection is undeniable.

Later, the inspiration of Bardot was more appropriately used for Madonna's "Sex" multimedia project, from the album art of Erotica, to her makeup in hair in the book Sex and film Body of Evidence (with Julianne Moore).
This isn't your typical "they stole/copied a given person" post, I was merely interested by how much influence this one time French model turned political activist has had.